GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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