I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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