I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize