after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Randomize
