Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
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