Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
