pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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