He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
