Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
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