I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
