the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
