I smell stomach acid.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
