It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize