Did you just see the Batmobile???
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
