Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
We had to coat check the pizza.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Randomize
