you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
