My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Randomize
