he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
