i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
