Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
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