Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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