i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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