the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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