Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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