I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize