He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
