if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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