Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
The police scanner is talking about you again....
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Drake has all the answers
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
