Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
