I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
