Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
