that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Randomize
