He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
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