Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize
