Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
