Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize