Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
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