With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
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