Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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