Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
