we made out on top of his cat.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
do nipples grow back?
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize