Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
