If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
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