Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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