How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Randomize
