I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
i believe in u and ur pee
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