After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
