How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I smell like Dick and happiness
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
