honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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