I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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