Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
